Day 10

Day 10 7/11/2010 - it is her birthday

Sean — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 05:00:00 GMT

This is apart of the dare, you need to be creative, you need to think of the less obvious.

Day 11 got to keep it simple

Leslie Holmes — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 05:00:00 GMT

great job on this dare. letting her think is good for her.

Day 10 was not so bad

mirjam — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Goodmorning everybody,

Well yesterday was my day 10. We had an appointment with our divorce-mediator, wasn't looking forward to that, because the last two times we went I just cried and cried and got angry etc. Was doing what I should be doing, but just talking about tearing everything apart felt like it was killing me inside.

Yesterday it went well though, I just thought about everything that I have already learned in these first ten days. And afcourse I prayed before, during and after.

I got to finish my dare for day 8. My husband was busy on a big project at work, that's almost finished and the second big project is going to go forward to. So that's the success I gongratulated him on. We had a nice conversation before going in to the mediators office and then we had a fruitfull negotiation.

At the end he did ask me something, which hurt a little though. He asked me to stop calling him sweetheart and love. You see I sent him a text to days in a row that started with sweetheart or love and ended with lots of love mir. He doesn't want me to do that anymore. I asked him why, he said it didn.t feel right. So I was a little dissapointed, but on my way home I thought well at least he's picking up on it.

Then last night, when he phoned with my kids he wanted to speak to me. He said he asked my youngest son where he was going to have a sleep over, because my daughter is having a slumberparty tonight, but my son couldn't answer him. So he asked me I told him that there was only one option left, but that I wasn't sure, because they have a kid with an earinfection and that boy needed a lot of attention. My husband then said, I could ask my parents. I was really surprised, because he seems to have the standpoint that, except for doctersappointments and the likes, you just have to arrange that stuff yourself when you have the kids.

So tonight his father is going to come pick my youngest son up for a sleep-over. I don't know what to think of all this. I decided to just leave it with the Lord and keep focussing on this journey I'm making to make God number 1 in my life.

I thank God for the joy he has already put back in my heart, for my children are beginning to see. I talked to my kids yesterday about how much God loves them. I told them: "You know mum and dad love you very much, can you imagine there is somebody out there that loves you even more?" They all said God. I was so glad and overjoyed, hope they always feel that way, always know that they can bring anything before God and he will help.

As for the dare for today, I cut the hedge. I plan on organizing his tools for him and just get the house nice and tidy.

Keep you posted on today.

Bye now

Mirjam

Re: Day 10 - time to wake up

Sean — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Sorry to hear about the findings. However, there is a plan. Just remember that. When I was in my situation, things were happening and I could not believe there was a plan that could be worth what was happening. BOY WAS I WRONG> I think back now, and it could have not happened any other way.

Here is the thing. You are learning the true meaning and blessings of Love. You need to accept them during this journey. And when you are ready, when Christ has molded you to where he wants you, then you are going to experience love like you never have dreamed.

Day 10- "Let's Be Friends?"

Abiiloveeees — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 05:00:00 GMT

I understand where you coming from and I know how hard it is to try to be "friends" with someone you love but be strong! I know it is hard but I believe that God is with you and molding you. Just keep your relationship with God. Continue the dare, try to do it for yourself and just keep praying and let God work on things. I know it is hard, I really do.. I will be praying for you Rachel. :)

Unconditional...............

Sean — Sat, 05 Jun 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Linda,

I am sure God will bless you with the desires of your heart. Just focus on his love.

Day 10: On Unconditional Love

Sean — Fri, 28 May 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Seeker, WoW. From all angles.

Well with the work situation. That one has to be tough. And you did good not making a quick decision. You need to take time to pray about that. It may be Gods way of working something in your life. Remember, he will never give you more than you can handle. But with your growth in Christ in this journey, you will be a testimony to him, and that will show to even your co-workers and management. So, just pray that you have comfort to be effective in your actions to show them that you have what it takes to get through this.

With your wife, she is still your wife. She is the one that needs to complete you. Remember your are ONE. With that said, if you need to confide in her do so. Men have this pride thing, and we tend not to open up to our wives and believe it or not, they do not consider that a good thing.

As for the manipulation... It is great that you realize that. Be careful of the small ones. That you may not recognize. I did the same thing.

Empty inside

Kathy — Thu, 13 May 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Linda,

I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I just started doing the love dare challenge for the man I love and want to marry. He has so much healing to do and right now, he has completely shut me out of his life because his expectations of me are so completely unrealistic (it hasn't always been this way, just FYI). I've had to tell him the same thing...if he walks away from what we have, there is no going back. If he does leave me, it will be because he is unhealthy and broken in his own heart and life.

As women, it's so hard for us to understand how a man can let us go out of unrealistic or unwarranted anger, and risk losing us completely. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Keep in prayer and stick with the challenge. God has you in His grip and no matter what happens, God will use it for His glory and your ultimate benefit. Hang in there and hit me up any time if you'd like to talk.

Kathy

How Do You Do Out of the Ordinary When Situation Is Not Ordinary

Leslie Holmes — Thu, 13 May 2010 05:00:00 GMT

since she is a gifts person, is there something small you could buy for her that she would appreciate?

Like Sean said, anything that shows you love her.

2nd Time Day 10

Sean — Thu, 06 May 2010 05:00:00 GMT

otty, Great Job not talking to her about the money and divorce. But be ready. the more you turn it over to God the more she will try to get a reaction... That is great. Keep trusting Christ.

Dare 10

Jason — Sun, 02 May 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Last night, I asked Court if she would like to go to church this morning. She said that she didn't think it was a good idea.I woke up this morning knowing exactly what I wanted to do, which was get her a M&M Blast from Sonic. She loves them. Problem was that I couldn't just go get one and take it to her without causing more problems. So, I called and of course she didn't answer. In the message, I told her good morning and said I hoped she had a good day and if I could do anything for her, like the blast. She text me back, no, thank you. She will only talk to me through text. A few minutes later she text and asked me why I had been doing all these nice gestures. I told her that God was working to change me into a more loving and kind person. She proceeded to tell me that she would love to be friends, but we will not be back together.I am a little shaken, but I know that Christ will get through this. 31 more dares, but a lifetime of change.

What now.......

Sean — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Even if you choose the "tough love" track. Do not lose your path with the journey here. Keep your dare going. And grow with Christ each day.

Day 10

Sean — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Leslie, so glad to see you back! And you are correct. One of the things about the dares it uses your marriage to teach us how to love Christ and allow him to mold us to be more in his image. This journey is great when you get everything out of it.

DAY 10: Love is Unconditional

Leslie Holmes — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Stan, this sounds like an excellent day! very happy for you!

Day 10: Smooth Sailing

Sean — Wed, 21 Apr 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Crystal, as things get better, we tend to forget or slack in our need for Christ. I am not going to say that is what you will do. What I want to point out is focus on Christ and your Journey. At the moment your dares and your husband are tools.... It is so easy for us to fall back when things are well. So start looking at yourself your past days and how they are now. If you are praying as much and serving the Lord. Then awesome. And if not, start putting the margin in your life to do so. This was my same concern as well when I was doing the dare... And if I did not have someone pointing that out, I am sure it would have happened. And keep posting. It is great to see God working in your life!

day 10 for me

Sean — Sun, 18 Apr 2010 05:00:00 GMT

rb, I just read this. And so I am not writing a long post. You really need to read my journals.

There are a number of dares that you are still not getting. And the biggest thing. YOU NEED TO LEAD YOUR HEART... By doing so, you need to be quick to listen and slow to speak. And the biggest problem I see in this post. LEAVE HER ALONE... You still think you can do it better than God. You can't. During this time, consider it a journey with Christ. And leave her to him. Don't pry, don't worry about her discussing with you. You are interfering with Gods plan by not allowing him to deal with her, while you are on your Journey... Now one other thing I must point out. You need to be more creative about your dares. There are not to many (in my eyes) that in some fashion that cannot be done each day. This is your chance to get out of the normal ways of doing things. Anyway, you are still going, which is good. But start leaving it to God....

Day 10 and she wants to start paperwork............

Marvin — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Definitely get a strong core support of brothers who are committed Christians who can lift you up in prayer and fellowship. I know it's hard but continue to focus on Christ, not the situation. This is the time Christ wants you to come to Him, the enemy wants you to focus on the apparent despair of the situation.

Day 10

Marvin — Thu, 25 Mar 2010 05:00:00 GMT

Keep going bro...you can do it!

day 10

Dan — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 05:00:00 GMT

This one took me a few days to figure out. I finally did a couple of things, like sitting a listening to what she was saying. I I plan on picking up some flowers on the way home today for here. It is hard because no matter what I do she really does not recieve it, but I plan to move on through the dares

Love Dare-Day 10 Feb 26

Leslie Holmes — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 06:00:00 GMT

good about your progress, not so good about the texting. While she may be happy about your relationship's current status, she may be looking for something else with this other guy, coming from the philosophy of 'what you don't get at home you look for elsewhere', which may come from your relationship's previous status. Keep moving forward.